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Writer's picturelesrjohnson28

Day in the Life of an English Premier League WAG

The English Premier League multi-million footy circus started once again with even more incredibly extortionate transfer sums and salaries being dished out to players and clubs and it is no wonder that the latest influx of WAG's (wives and girlfriends) hoping for a piece of the multi-million cake (and footy players tattooed sexy bodies) has also risen to astounding levels of naked boobs and bums being flashed all over Brit tabloids.


Jaggedone decided to send his infamous 'fly on the wall' called Fred (non-Brazilian version) to a luxury mansion in a gated complex on the outskirts of Manchester to listen in to what a WAG actually does all day long and here are his findings:


09.30 AM/nameless WAG laying on her gigantic silk-sheeted round bed with mirrors adorning the walls and ceiling chatting to her tattooed multi-millionaire footy star,


"Oh babe do you have to go to that horrid training again, after all we've been at it all night and you must be tired after 10 orgasms, and they were only mine."


"Yes baby, the club pay my multi-million wages and I have to train at least 3 hours a day."


"Poor babe, you have to work so hard, not only with me wanting non-stop sex, but also for that ghastly manager who can't even speak English. Darling, I am popping down to the Louis Vuitton shop today can I borrow the Bentley? I need a new handbag and they have one on offer for £10K, is that alright? I also have an appointment at the jewellers, I desperately need a new huge diamond ring to flash when I'm at your games because that ugly centre-forward's bitch WAG has been flashing hers all over the place, and even the Daily Star took a photo of it!"


"No problem baby, but don't take the Bentley, take the Rolls Royce, don't scratch it, and don't get a parking ticket they'll think it's me abusing my millionaire status again and again."


"Oh babe, you are so kind, now come back to bed for a quicky before you go."


"Sorry baby you'll have to wait till I get home after my strenuous work-out, then we can bonk until tomorrow morning, have you got your diamond-studded sexy string out of the washing?That really gets me throbbing!"


"I'll ask our Ukrainian cleaner to wash it, bless her refugee soul, it was still a bit soiled after last-night's session. Darling, I have made an appointment with the plastic surgeon, I need a boob uplift and I noticed my booty has got two tiny wrinkles on both buttocks, left and right, and I must have them removed before our next holiday in the Seychelles, those damn paparazzi want closeups these days."


"OK baby, no problem, but make sure you have the op when I'm away with the club on foreign duty because I can't have you lying here half-naked when I get home and not have a hot-bonking session after working so hard playing footy."


"Oh darling you are so kind, I need your platinum credit card too, I've got a date with our other WAG's at a 5 star restaurant this evening and I need a new Chanel dress because the last one only shows a quarter of my boobs and I need to flaunt at least a half of a nipple, got to keep the Daily Star readers titillated."


"No problem babe, you can also flash that tattoo on your butt that'll get them going, me too. Now I must be off, our new manager demands we be on time otherwise he'll fine us £5000,00 and I only take home £250000 K a week and I really can't afford that because I have to purchase a new bigger yacht to compete with old Ronaldo!"


"Ooh baby you are so considerate, and after I get back from my 5 star dinner I promise I'll be waiting her with my pink-coloured pussy open and waiting for your tattooed throbbing pride and joy to enter and at least have a multi-orgasm to finish off my most tiresome day being a WAG. It is such a wonderful life, but it can be tiring doing all this shopping, dining, posing for paparazzi, and spending your wages, but I love you really deep down, it's not just your money. Darling pass me the huge pink vibrator I think I need an orgasm and cannot wait until tonight."


"OK darling here it is; I know you love me not my money so hopefully the club will give me a new multi-million contract next season because I love you too, and if they don't, I can't afford you, see you later."


The days of hard leather footballs, muddy pitches, earning peanuts, 'normal wives and girlfriends' are over thanks to the English Premier League, its primadonna footballers, and their wonderful, plastic WAG's!



Footy certainly aint what it used to be thanks to footy stars 'wagging' their tattooed tails (and bank accounts) at these WAG's

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