After 'dangling around' since 1501, it required an American art teacher to establish Michelangelo's statue, David, as the most significant piece of 'pornographic art' ever to be 'outed' in public! Normally such images are only 'outed' on dodgy websites on the internet!
Thanks to Michelangelo, David's 'favourite toy' which has 'hung' for over 522 years, with art lovers from all over the planet never really thinking his naked penis, sculptured in cold marble, having anything to do with pornography! However, that all changed after David's image was shown to a class of US art students, aged 11 and 12, revealing his '522-year-old-tool' and parents of these smartphone-addicted kids decided, enough is enough! "Our children can see their dad's 'willy' in the bathroom, but heavens above, they should not be seeing a 522 year-old 'willy' dangling in public acclaimed as a sculptured masterpiece by global art connoisseurs who love David, and his naked 'ding-dong!'
Kids now visiting art museums all over the planet, and being confronted with naked bums, bosoms, and willies, painted by some of the most brilliant artists ever known will not be allowed to observe such masterpieces in their nakedness. Moreover, every masterpiece showing naked parts of the human body will be covered up when school kids, with their teachers, wish to enter museums! After kids below the age of fifteen have left the building, undamaged, entrance age will only be allowed from eighteen and over!
The poor art teacher who dared show David's 'willie' to his class of cool-kids has been given the boot, although several nippers quite enjoyed seeing an 'ancient marble dick' dangling, especially the females in the class who went home and told their dads that their 'favourite toy' was tiny compared to David's. Florida plastic surgeons have now been inundated with requests for penis extensions!
The modern, global art fraternity has agreed that David's statue is to be recognised as the first piece of porno-art ever to be shown in public! Famous global museums 'exposing' masterpieces with parts of the naked body will now be renamed with a warning;
Museum of Art & Pornography! (Children under fifteen no entrance until we cover up the nude parts!)
High-end fashion labels are now clambering for this latest line of business begging museums to hang their undies on masterpieces with naked body parts! Dolce & Gabbana have signed an exclusive deal with Rome, Madrid, London, NY. H & M had no chance!!
Comments