top of page
Writer's picturelesrjohnson28

Jesus keeps telling the world the 25th of December is not his f'ing Birthday it is FAKE!

Ever since the myth went out that baby Jesus was born on someday, somewhere,, which and where nobody really knows, the scribes of the time, modern day paparazzi in other words, decided to create his birthday somewhere near the end of their calendar year because this would celebrate the beginning of their new year, and having the 'Son of God', their God as a symbol of new life, wrote, "OK let's have it on the 25th of December, or thereabouts!


After the myth was transmitted to Rome by all conquering Romans, and Christians took over the place, they decided to plonk his birthday on the 25th of the last month of their year. not everybody's year because the Chinese believe only in their calendar, which is much more ancient. The Maya's, and other empires, also had different calendars before Christianity decided to plunder, rape, and rob all of these ancient civilizations of their fundamental rights, and brutally forced Christianity down the throats of their victims.

Now the real Jesus, who has been resurrected several times throughout history, is now sick to death of Christians getting his birthday wrong. Jesus has appeared in several locations all over the planet in an attempt to put 'fake history' in its rightful place as being 'utterly fake!' Once he appeared beggar in the streets of Naples, but the Neapolitans ignored his attempts, and threw him to the lions, so God buried them in volcanic ash.


Later he appeared as an impoverished Jew in the Warsaw Ghetto, the Jewish fraternity ignored his pleas to get out before it’s too late because Hitler didn’t give a shit about his fake birthday! The rest is history, burnt to ashes. As retribution, God sent the Russians in to wipe Nazis off the face of the planet because have their own calendar too.

In 2021, Jesus reappeared as a homeless beggar in a Los Angeles tent-city where he was preaching to other 'muy pobres' that his birthday is not on the 25th of December, it is all 'Fake Fucking News!'. The majority of his homeless colleagues, being of Latino/Mexican origin, listened to this so-called-born-again Jesus, and his holy message. Then they decided to burn his tent down, boot him out, and accused him of blasphemy because the real Jesus, as told by Spanish Conquistadores, lives in Rome, and shares a luxury double bedroom with the Pope!

God has now called his real son back to heaven because it was a complete waste of time attempting to convince Jews and Christians that their Christmas celebrations are a load of bollocks. God has now washed his hands of the human race, and sent Covid19 mutations down to earth to do the rest, AMEN!

Maybe they would believe this reincarnated version instead of the weaker versions, this Jesus seems much more persuasive, LOL!

14 views0 comments

Recent Posts

See All

Comments


bottom of page